July 16th, 2010 | Posted by Trong
This morning I had an interesting talk with my father about traditional weddings. A few weeks back we talked about how we're not going to have "Dinh Hon / Le An Hoi" because of the timeframe that my father will be in Vietnam. While I was doing my research how to obtain Visa's for my fiancee I found that Consulate officiers are harder now due to all the fake marriages around. My father said that we're not going to have Dinh Hon becuase of the limited time he is in Vietnam to attend. It's important for parents to attend wedding so only wedding is nessescary. I then told him about the VIsas process. He said that its not important because we're truthful so nothing going to happen. If Huong fail we'll just keep trying again and soon she'll be over here with me.
I got my dad really upset because Vietnamese wedding are discuss between the two parents. Each family has their own values and morals that they have to keep so its important to let the parents do the discuss and planning for the wedding day.
First we have to go over to the bride side and ask fo marriage approval. Then there's the Dinh Hon (engagement party) follow by 3 years slave labor!
What i the world is slave labor? Curious as I am again…
"Dad what is 3 years slave labor"
After Dinh Hon the Groom (soon to be son) every 2-3 days Groom has to go over to Fiancee house to do all sorts of slave labor from digging, helping the father-in-law, and working int he farmlands (wheat fields). Now that's some crazy tradition! 3 years wait just to get marry! I'll die! hahahhaahh
Therefore as time moves we have to change the way " Dinh Hon" (Lễ ăn hỏi còn được gọi là lễ đính hôn – Also known as Le an hoi) are and still keep the importants of wedding.
Since my father is in Vietnam for limited timeframe and money problems he couldn't stay for long. He got his jobs and other things that he has to do so we're not going to have Le Dinh Hon, but it will just be a formal agreement and small party between the two family in replace of "Le Dinh Hon/ Le An Hoi". In traditional wedding its important for one of the parents to attend Dinh Hon and Wedding day, but since my father couldn't attend both we had to tweak the tradtional values to have only a wedding.
This make sense why traditional values are sometimes tweaked to suit the situation of each family needs, but still able to keep the ceremony of the wedding day! That explains why wedding are changed over time.
See you another day
are are adsfd